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Hey there people, welcome to episode nine of how to get your sheet together.

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As always, I'm super happy that you're here.

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The question that I received from my subscriber is, when you have an all-consuming goal,

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How do you make sure that you don't become too obsessive or rigid?

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So first of all,

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this will be a petite pod episode because honestly,

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I have a ton of sheet to sort out in my personal life.

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And so my apologies for that.

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I hope you will still enjoy this episode anyway.

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It will just be a little bit shorter.

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That's all.

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So when you have an all-consuming goal,

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how do you make sure that you don't become too obsessive or rigid?

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Well, first of all, I would question the goal itself.

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What exactly is this goal?

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And why is it so important to you?

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What exactly is driving you?

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You know, what deeper emotions or beliefs are connected to it?

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And I'm asking this because,

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for example,

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when I get very obsessive,

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the object of my obsession usually triggers some kind of fear,

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like my fear of failure or my fear of abandonment and those two are closely related also.

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So as a result, I have been very obsessive about work and relationships in the past.

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And I have talked about perfectionism in my last podcast episode.

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So it might be good for you to check it out as well, because it's related to this.

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So if you are driven by negative emotions like this, then it would be a good idea to work on it.

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For example,

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if you have this fear or disbelief about not being good enough,

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then it might be good to do some CBT,

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some cognitive behavioral therapy,

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to override that old programming clusterfuck going on in your mind.

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For me personally,

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it also really has helped me in the past to repeat to myself that I can trust that

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things will work out.

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And for those of you who know me, you know that this has taken me a long time.

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to get to this point because I had severe trust issues and I still struggle with it at times.

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And so I had to fake it till I make it.

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I used to laugh at these silly statements like, oh, you just trust that the universe will provide.

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There was zero trust.

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So for me, that was very difficult.

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But I did notice that, weirdly enough, the more I was holding on to things, trying to control them,

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The more things went wrong and the more I told myself to breathe and to trust and

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to see what would happen,

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the more things went right.

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And so you can always try it and see how it goes.

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For me, it worked really, really well.

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The next strategy is to always, always make sure that you have an at least somewhat balanced life.

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Meaning, you schedule in time for, I don't know, silly things like loved ones and hobbies and work.

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And definitely also self-care.

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Meaning, preparing healthy foods, exercising, sleeping.

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and taking a fucking break at least once a day would be good, right?

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Doing therapy, soothing your stress, all of those kind of things.

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So if you create a weekly schedule on Sunday or Monday,

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and you schedule in time for all of these, that will help to stave off obsession.

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You really need to have different things and people pulling at you to make sure

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that you don't just have one thing going on in your life,

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which then becomes your world.

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And of course, also, so you don't accidentally throw yourself into the hellhole that is burnout, right?

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So you need to have different things going on in your life because it's too easy to

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get consumed by one thing only.

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One bonus strategy,

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something a little bit related to this,

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is to keep telling yourself that you can't control anything except yourself.

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And to be honest, even that is easy at times.

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You have to really ride the wave in life and things will randomly happen.

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That means that whatever you're trying to do to reach your goal will have to be adjusted at some point.

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And that is normal.

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It doesn't mean you are a failure.

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It just means that life happens.

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So that's a good thing to keep in mind when you have an obsessive personality.

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So that was it guys.

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Again, it's a short episode, but I hope you enjoyed it anyway.

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And as always, keep the questions coming.

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Ciao.